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| The Closet of Shame |
Unsurprisingly, I'm not very willing to part with these things. Any of them. They're important! I got them at a great price! Or, just as likely, I paid way too much for them to just give them away!
But 'tis the season for giving, and packing up a few boxes for Goodwill might be just the thing to get you in the holiday spirit.* If you are like me, here are ten easy steps to giving away things you don't need.
1. Be in a generous mood. As Winston Churchill said, "Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference." I have decluttered my home many times, but the most productive and fulfilling episodes are the ones when I have a generous spirit, rather than a tidying, cranky, or overwhelmed spirit. (I think this is mainly because when I feel like cleaning, I also feel ambitious, and I look at all the items in the pile and see their unfulfilled potential. When I feel overwhelmed, I am tempted to just shove it all in the closet for another year.)
2. Gather some boxes and bags. Sure, you could start by piling it all on the floor and packing it up at the end, but in my experience, the more separate times I touch an item, the more likely I am to put it back into my closet. Also, if you find out that you don't quite have enough bags and boxes to contain the entire pile you've decided to give away, you are also tempted to reevaluate.
3. Decide on a stopping point. When are you going to be done? I like to do a room at a time, but you could decide to stop when you have three full boxes, or enough to fill up your trunk, or when a certain amount of time has passed. But if you're overly ambitious, and vow to purge the entire house of unwanted items, you might be in danger of becoming overwhelmed or burned out.
4. Invite your imaginary friend. Ok, so maybe you don't need this step, but when I need a little extra encouragement, this really helps me. Think of someone in your life that you genuinely care for and want to help. I usually pick my little sister, because not only is she a poor graduate student, but I also have a lot of practice giving her my old things! (About twenty-three years of practice!)
5. Evaluate each item. This is where my friend comes in. As I look at each thing, I imagine my sister visiting and admiring it. Gushing over it even.** And then I note my response. If imaginary me responds, "Really? I got it at such and such, and I really like it," then it's a keeper. If I think, "You like it? Take it! I'm not really using it," then I chuck it in the donate pile. If it's somewhere in-between, then I consider it for a while, and then make the decision.
6. Pack the items as you go. Don't give yourself any time to second-guess yourself. In the box, in the box, in the box. You'll have time to tidy up the boxes later.
7. Once you reach your stopping point, move all your items to another room. It's important for me to get the clutter out of its natural habitat. I've looked at that necklace on my nightstand for so long that it seems at home there. In the box, though, it looks like what it is - a thing that I don't particularly love, that might be nice for someone else.
8. Repack your boxes and consider donation options. This is the trickiest part, because it is tempting to keep your things. You could of course just throw everything into your car and take it to the same place, but I find this part to be really rewarding, and it helps motivate me to give next time. As I repack items (wrapping breakable things, etc.) I pay attention to the things I'm giving away, and I think about who exactly I'm giving them to. While I have a default thrift-store organization in mind, occasionally I have something that might go further somewhere else. For example, Jonny recently got rid of several shirts and pants he didn't really wear, but were perfectly good clothes. I estimated the sizes of some of the guys I knew and called them up. The shirts went to Jonny's brother, and the pants to a friend from church. Likewise, our thrift store doesn't take opened cleaning supplies or clothes hangers, but the local women's shelter does. Consider regifting possibilities too, if the idea doesn't offend you. Don't give away family heirlooms or important objects without trying to pawn them off on the most appropriate people to assume responsibility for them.
I want to be clear: I don't think the thrift store should only get the stuff no one else wants. I do think that if you put some thought into where your gifts can do the most good, not only does it actually have the potential to help more people, but it also can give you more satisfaction. You get to see the smile on your friend's face when you give her that necklace she has always admired, rather than leaving it in a mountain of things and hoping that someday, someone will rescue it from a thrift store rack. The more I give, the more I want to give to people and the organizations that serve them.
9. Take stock. Take a moment to think about how many things you've decided you don't need, and estimate how much it all costs. (Don't spend too much time on this, lest you be tempted to keep things because you're wasting money!) Think about what good that money would have done if you had just given it directly to charity, rather than spent it on things you didn't need. Goodwill can do a lot more with a donation of $10 than it can with a "ten-dollar" donated item that it will process, price, and sell for $2. Promise yourself you'll do better next time you're tempted to buy something you don't need. (This step is especially important during the holidays - maybe it's time to reevaluate that Christmas wishlist?)
10. Deliver your things. Load up the car and drive the things away. Make sure to check the organization's donation hours and stipulations before you go. Don't let things sit around your house and migrate back to your closets! If you've put aside things for a friend or another organization, make solid arrangements to drop off the things, or have them pick them up. Set a time limit, give fair warning, and then if they're still in your house, get rid of them.
This list of tips is just one method among many, and is particularly tailored to my personal neuroses and inclinations. But I wrote it all down in case it might help you too! Happy giving!
1. Be in a generous mood. As Winston Churchill said, "Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference." I have decluttered my home many times, but the most productive and fulfilling episodes are the ones when I have a generous spirit, rather than a tidying, cranky, or overwhelmed spirit. (I think this is mainly because when I feel like cleaning, I also feel ambitious, and I look at all the items in the pile and see their unfulfilled potential. When I feel overwhelmed, I am tempted to just shove it all in the closet for another year.)
2. Gather some boxes and bags. Sure, you could start by piling it all on the floor and packing it up at the end, but in my experience, the more separate times I touch an item, the more likely I am to put it back into my closet. Also, if you find out that you don't quite have enough bags and boxes to contain the entire pile you've decided to give away, you are also tempted to reevaluate.
3. Decide on a stopping point. When are you going to be done? I like to do a room at a time, but you could decide to stop when you have three full boxes, or enough to fill up your trunk, or when a certain amount of time has passed. But if you're overly ambitious, and vow to purge the entire house of unwanted items, you might be in danger of becoming overwhelmed or burned out.
4. Invite your imaginary friend. Ok, so maybe you don't need this step, but when I need a little extra encouragement, this really helps me. Think of someone in your life that you genuinely care for and want to help. I usually pick my little sister, because not only is she a poor graduate student, but I also have a lot of practice giving her my old things! (About twenty-three years of practice!)
5. Evaluate each item. This is where my friend comes in. As I look at each thing, I imagine my sister visiting and admiring it. Gushing over it even.** And then I note my response. If imaginary me responds, "Really? I got it at such and such, and I really like it," then it's a keeper. If I think, "You like it? Take it! I'm not really using it," then I chuck it in the donate pile. If it's somewhere in-between, then I consider it for a while, and then make the decision.
6. Pack the items as you go. Don't give yourself any time to second-guess yourself. In the box, in the box, in the box. You'll have time to tidy up the boxes later.
7. Once you reach your stopping point, move all your items to another room. It's important for me to get the clutter out of its natural habitat. I've looked at that necklace on my nightstand for so long that it seems at home there. In the box, though, it looks like what it is - a thing that I don't particularly love, that might be nice for someone else.
8. Repack your boxes and consider donation options. This is the trickiest part, because it is tempting to keep your things. You could of course just throw everything into your car and take it to the same place, but I find this part to be really rewarding, and it helps motivate me to give next time. As I repack items (wrapping breakable things, etc.) I pay attention to the things I'm giving away, and I think about who exactly I'm giving them to. While I have a default thrift-store organization in mind, occasionally I have something that might go further somewhere else. For example, Jonny recently got rid of several shirts and pants he didn't really wear, but were perfectly good clothes. I estimated the sizes of some of the guys I knew and called them up. The shirts went to Jonny's brother, and the pants to a friend from church. Likewise, our thrift store doesn't take opened cleaning supplies or clothes hangers, but the local women's shelter does. Consider regifting possibilities too, if the idea doesn't offend you. Don't give away family heirlooms or important objects without trying to pawn them off on the most appropriate people to assume responsibility for them.
I want to be clear: I don't think the thrift store should only get the stuff no one else wants. I do think that if you put some thought into where your gifts can do the most good, not only does it actually have the potential to help more people, but it also can give you more satisfaction. You get to see the smile on your friend's face when you give her that necklace she has always admired, rather than leaving it in a mountain of things and hoping that someday, someone will rescue it from a thrift store rack. The more I give, the more I want to give to people and the organizations that serve them.
9. Take stock. Take a moment to think about how many things you've decided you don't need, and estimate how much it all costs. (Don't spend too much time on this, lest you be tempted to keep things because you're wasting money!) Think about what good that money would have done if you had just given it directly to charity, rather than spent it on things you didn't need. Goodwill can do a lot more with a donation of $10 than it can with a "ten-dollar" donated item that it will process, price, and sell for $2. Promise yourself you'll do better next time you're tempted to buy something you don't need. (This step is especially important during the holidays - maybe it's time to reevaluate that Christmas wishlist?)
10. Deliver your things. Load up the car and drive the things away. Make sure to check the organization's donation hours and stipulations before you go. Don't let things sit around your house and migrate back to your closets! If you've put aside things for a friend or another organization, make solid arrangements to drop off the things, or have them pick them up. Set a time limit, give fair warning, and then if they're still in your house, get rid of them.
This list of tips is just one method among many, and is particularly tailored to my personal neuroses and inclinations. But I wrote it all down in case it might help you too! Happy giving!
*Goodwill is just one of the many worthy organizations to which you could donate things. I'm not particularly partial - it's just the first one that comes to my mind, and one I think nearly everyone is familiar with.
**This is particularly humorous if you know my sister - she doesn't gush. Ever.
**This is particularly humorous if you know my sister - she doesn't gush. Ever.
